Twiddling our thumbs and other bits

We dragged ourselves from our sick beds out into the cold winters night, drove through the dark on fog bound roads, around road blocks and detours, to arrive, a little frosted, at our destination. A warm and welcome greeting for all who had braved the winter chills to turn up at the meeting as we compared winter ailments, coughs and colds. The first one of the year for this artists group, and it turned out to be all women for once. It was good to see my arty friends again, and I knew the meeting wasn’t going to be an overly long one as there wasn’t a lot on the agenda. We settled ourselves in the meeting room, as we waited for our punctilious Chairman to arrive. He’s usually the first there, with his cheery smile and easy manner. The waiting lengthened, as we wondered where he was, perhaps delayed with the road blocks on country lanes, or perhaps with the fog on high ground, either way, he’d be here soon.

He wasn’t.

So, the ever efficient secretary decided that it might be prudent to start the meeting without him, and he could take over when he arrived. Which was bound to be shortly.We went down the points on the agenda, as fully as we were able, but after the great length of time of……..ooooh………… twenty minutes, we’d done it all! Mmm…. so where’s the Chairman then? Is he stuck in a ditch? Has there been an accident? Is he lost in the fog? Perhaps someone has been rushed to hospital? A quiet unease spread slowly through the room ………..

Then, someone said that it might be a good idea to ring his mobile, great idea, but no one had the number.  I suggested we rang his home phone, as I had that to hand, and perhaps his wife would know where he was and what was happening. The secretary used her mobile to ring, as the rest of us watched with slightly concerned eyes, mouths closed tight, in deathly silence.
Ring. Ring. Hello?

He answered!

Slight relief from the room as we realised he was ok, but what was wrong, why was he still at home? It turned out that he was still at home becuase as far as HE was concerned, the meeting was on Thursday! AH! ER.. no, it isn’t! 🙂 Amusement from the assembled group as relief set in that he was ok and had only got the wrong date for the meeting. What business that could be was conducted over the phone, whilst our illustrious Chairman got an ear bashing from his wife in the room with him, and also the piss taken out of him from the secretary on the phone at the same time for getting the date wrong! 🙂

So, that was the meeting, not a lot to discuss, but as we left the meeting room, we had to walk through a bar room, semi-full of men with warm pints of the local bitter in their hands. They’re a jolly group, mostly ex-miners, and I knew a couple of them, and stopped as they obviously wanted to chat – the first to comment on the fact that he’d been tempted to come in and pose as he knew I draw naked men and “their twiddly bits”!!! Guffaws of laughter from me regarding his description!! And the second commented that I ought to draw a retired miner mate of his since he had more that I might be interested in – I realised he was referring to them all being in the showers after a shift down t’pit and obviously comparing sizes (of  twiddles) whilst rinsing the black coal dust off themselves. All very jolly, and amusing, mostly because I hadn’t been drawing in the meeting room at all , but having a meeting in the meeting room, now with added visions of naked ex-miners rampaging into the room in the mistaken belief that we women in there wanted to draw them and their “twiddly bits”!!!!! Now, THAT would have lightened the proceedings more !!!!!! LOL (even more so that I’m the only one there who draws naked people, the rest draw landscapes, cats, flowers, and still life!!!!!!!!). Tee Hee

I've been an artist all of my life, and my paintings now hang on walls in Europe, USA and Canada. I'm working on getting them on the other continents! My wide range of artwork has been exhibited nearer to home in the East Midlands, with the Guild of Erotic Artists at Beaumont Hall Studios in Hertfordshire, and at "Erotica", Olympia, London. I have also been featured alongside my work in the Guild of Erotic Artists book (volume 2). I love to create dramatic interest in my pictures, whether it’s to paint an unusual landscape, or just to utilise dramatic lighting in my figure drawings or strong colour in my animal portraits. Delighting in the spontaneous tendencies of watercolour adds an interesting and distinctive look to my paintings, some of which are purposefully ambiguous, enabling the viewer to use their own interpretation of my artwork. I also love to hide images, and humour within my paintings, whether it’s a secret message, or an erotic couple hidden within a landscape, or even an erotic landscape where the couple are camouflaged as the features of the land itself. I am equally happy painting in oils, acrylics or watercolours and love to draw with pencil or ink. I have also developed the very effective method of drawing using white pencil on black card which creates dramatic pictures by just picking out where the light catches the body and leaving the rest of the image to the imagination, in darkness. I can also utilise many different styles, whether it is realistic, abstract, surrealistic, erotic, fantasy or camouflage art where something is hidden within the painting. I'm just passionate about my art, whatever I paint! But, it doesn't matter how many landscapes or pet portraits I paint, its always the erotic stuff that people are interested in! I started blogging to share some of the strange conversations I have with the people I meet. But its evolved into far more than that now.

Comments (6)

  1. Anonymous
    Jan 21, 2010

    check out this all in one google international

    i hope it could be more useful for you

  2. Jackie Adshead
    Jan 21, 2010

    Anonymous – thankyou.

  3. Spiky Zora Jones
    Jan 22, 2010

    Hi jackie: that sounds like a good evening. light and airy conversation. And a meeting that went well because a certain person was not there to attend. hehehe

    We have a gal that just keeps a meeting going and going. I have to move her along…let's keep focused and let's not toss nonsense into it.

    ciao honey

  4. Jackie Adshead
    Jan 22, 2010

    Spiky – Yes, light and airy conversation makes for a lovely evening!

    Yeh, you're right about keeping a meeting focused and not going on and on with it – that's what agendas are for!!! 🙂

  5. BlazngScarlet
    Jan 22, 2010

    The rest could have added their landscapes, flowers, cats and still life to your "twiddly bits"!

    Now THAT would have been quite a drawing! lol

  6. Jackie Adshead
    Jan 23, 2010

    Blazng Scarlet – MMm… yes it would!!!! LOL

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