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Joking apart

I was recently reminded of an erotic art joke and thought I’d share it with you……….

An artist had been working on a nude portrait for a long time. Every day, he was up early and worked late – bringing perfection with every stroke of his paint brush. As each day passed, he gained a better understanding of the female body and was able to really make his paintings shine.

After a month, the artist had become very weary from this non-stop effort and decided to take it easy for the day. Since his model had already shown up, he suggested they merely have a glass of wine and talk – since normally he preferred to do his painting in silence.

They talked for a few hours, getting to know each other better. Then as they were sipping their claret, the artist heard a car arriving outside. He jumped up and said, “Oh no! It’s my wife! Quick, take off your clothes!”


And whilst I’m in the mood for joke telling……..

How many artists does it take to change a light bulb?

Ten. One to change it, and nine to reassure him about how good it looks.


How many modern artists does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to throw bulbs against the wall, one to pile hundreds of them in a heap and spray-paint it orange, one to glue light bulbs to a cocker spaniel, and one to put a bulb in the socket and fill the room with light while all the critics and buyers are watching the fellow smashing the bulbs against the wall, the fellow with the spray-gun, and the cocker spaniel.


How many visitors to an art gallery does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to do it and one to say “Huh! My four-year old could’ve done that!”
How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?



11 thoughts on “Joking apart”

  1. May be you should stick to painting .. on that you can improve, as for the jokes.. they're really bad!

  2. Jackie Adshead

    Anonymous – ok – but you do seem to be smiling, so they're obviously not THAT bad! 🙂

  3. OK so I hit the wrong expresion button, try this one then :-O.

  4. Jackie Adshead

    Anonymous – Ok, but I'm not sure what that is – shocked? 🙂

  5. Yeah .. shock ! Maybe if you just stick to playing with paint brushes… leave the jokes for the real comedians, the one's who actually make their audience laugh.

  6. :-O = SHOCKED!
    🙂 = SMILING!
    :)))) … THIS ONE'S OBVIOUS!
    %¬( PISSED OFF…
    :-# GIVING HEAD.

  7. Well it's ovious you needed help! Try this one then :-@.. tongue tied!

  8. Jackie Adshead

    Anonymous – ah…. but I don't know that one as tongue-tied – I know it as something else……… 🙂

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