I’ve noticed recently how many people don’t make eye contact when they pass in the street. I always look at people as they walk towards me, although obviously it depends where I am and whether its likely to encourage trouble if I do it, so I am somewhat circumspect as to my surroundings! Some people look at me, and will smile at my open gaze, but, on the whole, people don’t look at other people. Perhaps we’ve all been conditioned nowadays not to do it, which is a shame. And I’m so used to doing it, as its my job, to look, to observe, to record the details. I find whilst I’m standing quietly somewhere, in a queue or a busy bar, that I people watch and can always find beauty in the tiniest detail – the curl of hair in the nape of the neck, long sweeping dark eyelashes, polished fingernails, the glint of red in a head of dark hair, the startling blueness of a pair of eyes, or the sensual fullness of a bottom lip. And of course there’s the larger details, the freshness of teenage skin, the full hips of a sexy older woman, the tightness of a pair of male buttocks, the gentle curve of a female thigh, the squareness of a mans shoulders, the fullness of perfectly rounded breasts. I was told a few weeks ago by a female friend that she’d always had a big sexual fantasy about being drawn in minute detail, all her innermost details examined and inspected then captured down on paper, and I’ve been told by a man I’ve drawn recently what a turn on it was to be observed in minute detail, in almost a detached scientific way, then to see his naked body created on the paper infront of me, he felt was a very erotic situation. I suppose it must be. I don’t know why I was surprised to hear it, as I spend as much time assessing a subject to draw whatever it is, although admittedly a vase might not have quite the same level of eroticism about it as a semi-naked body. Then afterwards when my model sees the finished drawing, to know how they were feeling when I drew them, how I’ve captured their essence, their sexuality, the eroticness of the situation, they realise how much I’ve seen………..
Did you ever think that the reason people don’t look up at you when you pass them in public is that they don’t want to see you, they don’t want to have their complacency challenged, and they are insecure about their own self-worth? It’s easier to live in a cocoon of your own construction than to interact with real people who might challenge your beliefs.
That said, having a painting done would be the sincerest form of affirmation–all the details the artist finds attractive would be prominently recorded in an appealing and erotic way. I can see how this would be a huge turn-on . . .
Cherrie – No, I hadn’t considered that, but I know I can enhance their own self-worth in an image of them, given the chance….
I have noticed that people (mostly women) sometimes smile at me when I am out in the street. Like you, I usually look people in the eye with an open expression.
I think I read somewhere that if two people hold eye contact for more than a few seconds, the eyes open wider which is the first hint of a smile. I guess some people respond to that hint by smiling back.
If people feel challenged, then I think that is their problem.
Hornymaleuk – Yes, I think it is their problem. I shall continue to look people in the eye, and smile, and ….sometimes…… it leads on to more interesting things…..
I’ve looked at your web site. It’s got some reasonable drawings but, to be honest, they do seem just a touch high-priced fof the sort of detail and content. Good luck if you can sell them, though. On the other hand, if they are a way to make a ‘certain sort of contact’, and if they are doing that job, then that might be worth a lot to you.
I too love to people watch. I always look at folk when I’m out. That first initial smile, maybe they know you, maybe not but it’s fun making people aware that they’re being observed. If they look away then yes I agree with Cherrie may be they feel insecure about themselves, I guess for those of us like me and you Jackie who like to view are lucky in the way that we’re not insecure about our appearence, content in the way we come across. I’m tall and tend to stick out in a crowd, I love to be seen.
Indigo – yes, perhaps its being happy to be seen, that makes us more curious to look!
Anonymous – its a pity you don’t appreciate my artwork, other people seem happy enough with the prices, but of course art is in the eye of the beholder.
As to making contact, its always nice to meet people interested in art.
Just by coincidence came across this bit of poetry by poet Les Murray
The ones whose eyes
do not meet yours
is alone at heart
and looks where the dead look
for an ally in his cause.
Your smile is a gift and a blessing to those passing by you. I hope you don’t ever stop being friendly. I live in a small seacoast town here in America and many people say hello and good morning but some do not, even in return, and that does often cause a bit of rejection-pain. The sensitivity to others that makes us artists so observant and creative can also be a source of pain.
from HonorAndDesire
in America
Honoranddesire – what lovely poetry, thankyou for sending it to me. I hope I don’t ever stop being open and friendly, too!
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