As I had fully expected, the postman arrived today bearing a long letter from Stuart writing about his experience of commissioning me to do the cheeky cards artwork for him. He has given permission for me to print the pertinent parts of it here…….
Enclosed are my recollections of the production of the wonderful cards. They are absolutely brilliant.
I do not have a favourite at the moment but no doubt one will emerge. Many thanks for your patience over this project. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.
A few months ago I conceived the idea of having a few greetings cards produced to send to friends.
I wanted the cards to be well composed and amusing. The theme was to be me in the nude in four poses. As I am 73 years old, part of the humour is concerned with my age and also my sex as I consider the male genitalia must have been designed by someone who was a practical joker.
Who could produce these cards? Of course the answer was you as only 18 months previously you had depicted me in the nude in two beautiful drawings of which I am extremely proud. I knew from that experience that as well as being an accomplished artist, you are also a very delightful person, very patient, enthusiastic and encouraging. I would not have to divest myself of all clothing for a stranger which I find a bit of a trial.
When I rang you to tell of my intentions and would you be interested in the project your answer was an emphatic â€˜yesâ€™.
I next visited you and I ran through my ideas and we discussed the pictures and captions to accompany them.
We agreed on four cards, two to be quite innocuous, one explicit depiction and the other less so.
We started with the standing back view of my bum. I soon found that it is hard work to stand very still for any length of time. It takes physical endurance and concentration.
Before the second pose was taken up I spent some time walking round your studio naked. I find it extraordinary that in the presence of an attractive woman there was no sexual feeling at all, not even a twitch!
I took the opportunity of having a look at the first drawing. I thought â€œHello cheeky donâ€™t you have a beautiful bottomâ€ as it was quite attractive to me. I have not seen much of my bum during my life. Anyway we carried on before I fell in love with myself.
The next pose was to be standing, holding the triangle infront of me. During the pose I could see you occasionally holding your pencil at arms length and I thought â€œI wonder what she is measuring nowâ€. Thatâ€™s a typical male thought as we, as a sex, think that all females are full of admiration for the beauty and magnificence of our primary sex organ.
…looking forward to our meeting the following week.
When the day arrived we started with the â€˜long johnsâ€™ pose…..there was no problem in completing the pose as I had a chair to lean on, which made a great difference.
I was surprised when I took my first look at the picture. My genitals, which were the centrepiece of the picture, were quite impressive to me. My reaction was more marked because in the previous â€˜triangleâ€™ drawing my parts seemed quite small. That picture is, to me, very funny because of the position of my penis in conjunction with the triangle which makes it look like a company logo.
Earlier I had informed you of my doubts about doing the â€˜organâ€™ picture but you persuaded me to do it. It proved very easy to do and it is an image I like.
When I picked up the completed cards I was thrilled with them. They are my personal statement and unique gift to my friends and family. I left the captions off as I prefer to use different ones to different people.
As usual, I am in awe of your talent as an artist and it has been my great good fortune to have met you. I have learned much about myself and a little bit about you and your art.
My confidence has been much enhanced. The days have gone when I considered doing a course in self-confidence but didnâ€™t because I was afraid to register.
I hope the six foot tall model I dated and who made mock of my â€œequipmentâ€ by saying, when I told her I wanted sex with her, replied, â€œIf you do and I find out there will be troubleâ€.
(as usual, and much to my amsement, he has completed his letter with a joke. It made me smile for the rest of the afternoon, after reading it….) LOL